John Maynard reporting.
Hello, Magnolians. This column is the result of what happens when you sit down on the sidewalk bench in front of Le Roux and have a conversation with Steve Smalley. So every couple of weeks or so, I’ve agreed to address such matters as…
THE MCGRAW STREET TREES OF GLORY. Kudos to Dan Penhollow for dragging a ladder and lights up and down McGraw illuminating the madronas with holiday majesty. Of course, supervised by Gaard Swanson (read: walking by and cheering Dan on to get a little higher up… just one more rung, Dan, you can do it.) Thanks for your help, Gaard.
And issues such as…
THE HEARTBREAK AND FURY OF FELONY THEFT. I’m sure we all missed Carol Ard (and Tom’s) elaborate Halloween Alley this year. If you haven’t heard, all of their displays and decorations were stolen from their farmhouse in Poulsbo. And to the perps, may the many sheriffs of Kitsap Forest plop hot coals of jurisprudence down the front of your trousers.
And…
RACCOONS. It was brought to your reporter’s attention this week that hungry raccoons have been entering the residence of Joe Micheals (booth announcer for KING TV) through the cat door.
I pointed out to Joe that raccoons were here long before us. It is we who have encroached on their territory and in my opinion it is they who should have eminent domain.
Hold on, this bulletin just handed to me… A brand new business has just opened in Magnolia Village. We welcome Joe Micheals’ Davy Crockett Hat Shoppe. All sizes. And, if you’re looking to dress up your car antenna….
And finally…
Here is a query for a certain faction of Magnolians. Can anyone think of a PAC 12 football coach who stands morosely on the sidelines looking like he just sniffed a bad diaper? Well, can you? Just a question.
By the way… did I mention in my last post that leaf blowers are the work of Satan? Oh, I did? Good.
Thanks for reading. See ya in a couple of weeks. And please address all comments and complaints immediately to Steve Smalley.